I’m Not Attracted To You
What’s the worst feedback you’ve ever had?
For me, it was the time I was told by a guy I liked that he wasn’t attracted to me. After allowing myself time to be upset, it dawned on me that the issue for me wasn’t so much that he didn’t find me attractive, but that in my mind, I agreed with him. He’d hit on an insecurity, a deeply held self-limiting belief. Imagine a similar scenario but in this situation the receiver of bad news is fully confident in their appearance. Their response would likely be completely different. Perhaps they’d think it was the other person’s loss or simply brush off the experience and get back out on the dating scene. For me though, this was ‘evidence’ to confirm what I believed about myself: that I’m not enough (*laughs in confirmation bias*).
Fortunately, I’d been doing a lot of inner work at the time and chose to put what I’d learnt into action. I reached out to close friends for support and practiced self-hypnosis to help dissolve my negative belief about myself, upgrading it with one that would build my confidence and self-worth. Over the next few weeks and months, despite a few wobbles, my negative self-belief about my appearance dissolved and I became more confident. I look back at that moment now through a new lens: instead of being the worst feedback I’ve ever had, it was probably the best. Without it I wouldn’t have been confronted by my own limiting belief or taken steps to change it for the better.
“Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your handbrake on.”
Maxwell Maltz
As medics, receiving feedback from colleagues or patients is a regular part of the job. Whilst we can’t control the feedback we’re given, we do have power over how we think, feel, and react to it. So, what’s the worst feedback you’ve ever had and how has it impacted you? Let me know in the comments.
If you’re a medic who wants to build your confidence or work on self-limiting beliefs, book a discovery consultation with me, Dr Connie Kerali, by clicking the link below to find out how coaching and hypnotherapy could help you.
Whilst results can vary from person to person, I can guarantee that I will use the same empathetic, non-judgmental, professional, and holistic approach that I’m well known for as a doctor. I will listen to the challenges that you are facing in your own life, and we can work together to create a tailored coaching and self-hypnosis program that will help you to achieve your well-being goals.
I look forward to working with you.
